Remember the story you read when you were little about the mice that were cousins, one living in the country and one living in the city? By the end of the story, each had experienced the other's life firsthand, and found a new appreciation for their own everyday existence. That story has always reminded me of the way people are, in some ways. We all have an opinion about other people's lives, but not necessarily based on our own experiences, or even our knowledge of geography.
One of my friends had a sister who was living in New Mexico for a while, while my friend lived in Miami. Her sister sent her a check in payment for part of a birthday gift for their father. When my friend took it to the bank for deposit, the teller told her she would have to take it to a bank that dealt with foreign currencies, since it was from outside the U.S.!
I have experienced the same kind of thing. I was born and lived for many years at different parts of my life in West Virginia. Upon hearing this fact, people often react in two possible ways. The first possible response is: "Oh, I have friends who live in Richmond." This is of course, fascinating to me for two reasons: a) Richmond is in Virginia, which is a completely different state, and b) it's just such a coincidence, since I too have friends who live in the continental United States! The second response is: "Wow, was it hard for you to (choose one): get used to wearing shoes; get used to indoor plumbing; move away from the country? There are of course other variations on this second one, but you get my drift. (The answers, by the way are: no, I've always worn shoes on a regular basis; no, I've always lived in a place with indoor plumbing; and no, it wasn't hard to move away from the country, because I never lived in the country!)
The other assumption is that I have never traveled, and have no idea about other places in this country and in the world. People ask if I enjoy living in Philadelphia, away from the provincialism of small towns. I am certainly more fortunate than a lot of other people in many other places, as my parents were very well read and interested in what was going on in the world. We moved a lot, and so had the chance to see what life was like in different parts of the country, in large cities and small towns. Sure, there are some places that I was more than happy to move away from, and there were others that were really great. But I have to tell you that the remarks about "provincialism" in small towns always amuse me. I've met plenty of people who were provincial, but I've got news for you, a lot of them were "sophisticated" big-city dwellers!
Everyone thinks it's really funny when someone from Anytown, U.S.A., visits Philadelphia, and is astonished at all of the traffic, tall buildings, and fancy restaurants. I mean, doesn't that just emphasize their otherwise closed, provincial little lives? Why though, is it not at all odd, and certainly *not* provincial, when someone who has grown up in one Philadelphia neighborhood has never set foot in other parts of the city? It's not that I care whether or not they have; I just don't understand why that is not considered "provincial."
Years ago, my husband and I lived in the Chicago area. We were looking at apartments in Oak Park, which is a western suburb, but next to the city line. Our potential landlord was extolling the virtues of the neighborhood, and mentioned that there were even some houses that we would probably be able to afford there, once we got tired of living in an apartment. My husband said something like, "Well, at some point, we'll most likely move back East," and the potential landlord replied, "Oh, closer to the Lake?" [meaning Lake Michigan], to which my husband replied, "No, *over* it." Yes, it's clear that his keen sense of geography led to his success in the real estate world (location, location, location?) ...
Another question that I get, since I'm from West Virginia, involves whether or not members of my family have married one another -- you know, first cousins marrying one another. Because of course, that's what people from West Virginia do. When it happens there, the people are hillbillies. When it happens in England, it's called the Royal Family.
Reminds me of the story of the person from Iowa who visited a relative in New York City. They went to big splashy party at a penthouse apartment, and one of the other partygoers asked the guest where her home was. The visiting relative replied, "Iowa" and the partygoer pulled her aside and said in a confidential whisper, "Honey, here we pronounce it 'O-hi-o'."
So remember the next time you are visiting Hicksville, that some of those rubes may actually have been to places like Los Angeles, New York, London, and Paris; or have an idea of which political party is currently in power in India. But it might also be a good idea to remember that not everyone from Philadelphia knows how to get to 30th Street Station ...
